Re: Handstand Command

Handstand Command was conceived, at, well, uh, at an orgy.

In February of 1999, several members of what would later be know as the Handstand Command music collective attended a party in Arlington, MA. Much to their chagrin, they discovered that the soiree was a relatively mellow affair. In an attempt to show how "zany" and "off-the-wall" they were, they proceeded into the frozen ice-laden backyard to play a game suggested by one Ms. Hardcore Dan of Rockville Center, NY. The game: Handstand Command.

The rules were simple. All contestants simultaneously assumed the position commonly known as a handstand. The individual that could remain upright for the longest period time was granted the power of "handstand command." For the rest of the evening, the winner could command any one at any time to do a handstand. The supplicants had no choice but to obey. After many drunken half-assed attempts at handstands that resulted in sprained thumbs, bruised backs, and no clear winners, our heroes limped back into the party, convinced that they would be hailed as the Lifes of the Party. They were sadly mistaken.

They were greeted at the door by two women, two women who had previously been wearing clothes. Several attempts were made at convincing the "indie rockers" to lose their thrift-store garb. The indie rockers, who but a few minutes ago thought themselves unstoppable debaucherous hedons, discovered how uptight they truly were. One by one naked people appeared, then disappeared into a small bedroom off the hallway. The indie rockers, shocked at what they had discovered about themselves, retired to the living room to drink with more determination.

As flesh writhed in the bedroom, a musical collective was born. A musical collective of prudes, perhaps, but a musical collective nonetheless.

WE ARE THE HANDSTAND COMMAND.